Another Way

    You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, well you just might find, you get what you need.

    I never thought of the Rolling Stones as the purveyors of any sort of metaphysical message, although Sympathy for the Devil and Soul Survivor are pretty cool songs.
    But the refrain from You Can't Always Get What You Want  was ringing in my ears the other night after a conversation with Busting Loose buddies. (Seriously, if Mick Jagger can't get what he wants, that's probably all you need to know) As I was explaining some "problem" in my hologram, I created my friend Terrence to point out that I was deeply mired in the belief that "I will never get what I want."
    And then the cloud lifted. I'm not even sure that I can explain what happened. As readers of this blog know, I've confessed to a lot of self-defeating beliefs that I've accumulated and given power to and turned into monster eggs during my lifetime.
    But as I kept repeating the mantra, I will never get what I want, it became apparent how that has overlaid my entire worldview and hologram. There was not a single issue in my life that couldn't be traced to that simple root cause -- and it made me happy to know that.
    It was sort of the grand unified theory of Busting Loose, at least for me. Every egg in my holographic universe was hatched from that belief.
    Seriously, try it. Think of anything in your hologram that creates discomfort. Then see if that phrase doesn't cover it.
    Busy? Well, I'll do it for you. Got a relationship, but it's just not working? Repeat after me: It's because I will never get what I want.
    Continuously creating exciting job or business opportunities that never seem to pan out? It's because I will never get what I want.
    Illusory bank account a little too low for comfort? Guess what? It's because I will never get what I want.
    Your immensely talented rock band never got the big break? It's because I will never get what I want.
    Can't seem to lose that last 20 pounds of fat? It's because I will never get what I want, namely, the body of an Olympic swimmer.
    Still struggling towards enlightenment? Fuhgeddaboutit. I will never get what I want.
    Now some of you might misinterpret this as just casual sarcasm, or sincere cynicism on my part, and you would be most wrong. I don't repeat this wisdom simply to prepare myself for failure. That's a Phase 1 methodology. Assume the worst, and then be happy when you're right? That's not what I'm getting at. For me, it's the daily double of practicality and spirituality.
    Busting Loose calls on us to embrace our discomfort. When your mantra is I will never get what I want, you can pass Go and collect as much discomfort as you want. In my role as Mr. Efficiency, I figure there is no reason to waste time wallowing in the whys and wherefores of each particular reminder of our self-imposed limitations. Nope, just get to the point. To immediately remind myself that it's all an unobtainable illusion, and be able to get right to the discomfort, is strangely comforting.
    Secondly, as Busting Loose students, we know that what our personas want is not necessarily what's best for us. But with Expanded Self, we get what we need to support us in playing the Human Game.
    It's also important here to stress that the stress is on the wanting, not on the thing wanted.
    I will never get what I want, because want implies personal will, which implies the need to change what is. Want is the end result of the accumulation of beliefs, desires, memories, social conditioning, thoughts -- all the pillars that hold up our flimsy circus tent of illusion.
    I will never get what I want reminds me to surrender my will at every opportunity and be with what is.
    Now, what makes the game fun, of course, is that while you can't always get what you want, occasionally the desires of our persona and our Expanded Self will line up perfectly, like cherries on a slot machine, and it will appear that you got what you wanted. It might even appear that you made it happen. That would be foolish to believe, of course, like believing that the hot blonde who blew on your lucky nickel before you inserted it into the machine caused you to hit the jackpot. But it's understandable. For that, I have no answer except to do the process and acknowledge that whatever it was that happened was just an illusion. You can get too much of a good thing, if it makes you forget.
    Of course, the truth is that the real me has everything already. Whatever it is that I will never get, is already mine. And by actually processing the discomfort around whatever it appears I lack, I may actually create it from my consciousness. I just forgot.
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8/14/2010 12:15:04 pm

I love love love this post. It absolutely hit home in a way I believe your blog and your thinking ever has. This is some next level shit, Tony.

Another Way
8/14/2010 11:41:58 pm

Thanks, Chris. That means a lot coming from you/me.

8/15/2010 12:53:50 am

amazing insight. thanks for sharing!

8/16/2010 04:24:08 am

great post. Stark raving truth.

8/17/2010 11:43:07 am

You just took my vague thoughts and crystallized them into words. Could it be you have found the Universal Egg? Appreciation for the creativity that is Us!

Another Way
8/18/2010 03:24:21 am

The Universal Egg, I like that.

8/18/2010 05:50:18 am

I saw her today in my illusion
A glass of wine in her hand
I knew she would create more confusion
At her feet was a busting loose man

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
If you bust enough eggs you see
You have what you need
Oh baby, yeah, yeah!

And I went back to my latest illusion
To get my fair share of abuse
Singing, "I’m gonna find some frustration
Then process more of those egg-busting blues
Sing it to me now...

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
If you bust enough eggs you see
You have what you need
Oh baby, yeah, yeah!

I went down to the Chelsea drugstore
To get my abundance fulfilled
I was standing in line with My Old Self
And man, did he look pretty ill
We decided that we would have a soda
My favorite flavor, cherry red
I sung my song to My Old Self
Yeah, and he said one word to me, and that was "dead"
I said to him

You already have what you want
You already have what you want
You already have what you want
You already have what you need
And if you try sometimes you just might find
You being joyful, at peace.

I saw me today at a reception
A glass of wine in my hand
I knew I would meet my reflection
A tall, handsome, busting loose man

I already have what I want
I already have what I want
I already have what I want
I already have what I need
And I find sometimes, and I find most times,
Me being joyful, at peace.

Terrence McKee
8/18/2010 07:07:05 am

. . . Glamorously expansive ! . . . ;) . . .

Space Cadet
8/18/2010 09:25:49 pm


Why don't you just forgive yourself for what never happened anyway. Doesn't embracing discomfort make what is unreal feel even real?

Another Way
9/28/2010 04:43:27 am

I guess I look at it this way. Embracing discomfort to learn where the eggs are is no different than embracing joy or anything else. Maybe they are both illusions in the hologram, but one is not better than the other. It's just a necessary step in MY process.

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